showponies
so, im here to say-"fuck the showponies!" there is a guy in town who i thought i had a crush on. a guy i thought i had some chemistry with. a guy who seemed interested.
but no. he is a musician (warning #1) who is in several different ventures in town. i met him when he got a massage-in fact, three in under two weeks. and he asked me to come check out one of his shows. so i did. and he was so nice, asked me for a drink afterward, etc. then, poof...nothing. for three weeks. so about the time i had let it go (and met someone else-more on that later) he calls and asks me to a different show of his. i wasnt busy, so sure-i went. and he was so nice, bought me a drink, dedicated a song to me as his massage therapist (which gave me quite a few stares and the obligitory comment about happy endings-people, i have heard it before-not original and not so funny.) then, a girl from his work shows up and i have seen her around so i start talking to her. well, when his set finishes he comes over and starts talking, drinking, and flirting with both of us. im still not bothered because im thinking-"she's a co-worker, he's got chemistry with me..." the night goes on and on...maybe i should have left earlier...in any case-i start to realize this girl is a showpony. she is so much like so many people i was on tour with.
"look at me, look at me-see me prance, wanna hear a song?" generally, these are very fun people and i love em, i swear. but through the fog of alcohol i started to realize this pony was planning on getting the blue ribbon that night. i am not a competitor. i will not talk over someone else to be heard. and i will not sing and dance to get laid-no matter how attractive the guy is. the sad thing is in my hopeful naivete i thought surely this attractive, talented man isnt going to fall for this-any minute she's going home-and maybe i'll go home with him. i am not an idiot-but i swear i thought he was just indulging his co-worker and waiting to be alone with me. till i came back from the bathroom. that fucked up feeling of when your heart literally hits the floor when you see the guy you thought you liked sucking face with the showpony and you realize he's not indulging her, he's indulging you and they are probably sweating bullets just waiting for you to leave so they can get the hell out of there and go have all kinds of animalistic sex. i think i actually felt my heartbeat in my ears. needless to say, i made feeble excuses and left-but not before he invited me to another show of his a few days later. dont ask me why i said yes-shock perhaps-yes, yes-anything to get out of here this instant. dont ask me why i went-but i did. maybe out of morbid curiousity-my inate desire to punish and ridicule myself. he talked to me between sets for one minute and said, "if you care about me-PLEASE have a beer waiting for me when i finish." sure, i got him a beer. which he came and got and walked away with for twenty minutes after the show. when he finally came back i told him i had to go. can you guess what happened....?
he invited me to yet ANOTHER show! thats when i realized-he's a fucking showpony too!!! meanwhile, ive really been getting more into another guy im seeing-so im thinking-"screw this jackass, really!!!"
i fully planned on probably never seeing him again (unless he comes in for massage of course which is out of my hands.)
but then last night...
jessie and i decided we will stop going to the bars during the week and go to the gym instead. last night was our first night going. i got there early and felt incredibly intimidated for whatever reason so i walked out front to wait for her. can anyone guess who i ran into? in my oversized, unfashionable workout clothes, greasy ponytail hair and no makeup? does anyone feel my pain?
yep-it was him. he pranced right up to me. there are 2.5 million people in las vegas. the odds of runnning into someone you dont want to see are extremely slim. the odds of running into them when you are having an insecurity-driven mini-panic attack and looking truly at your most hellish are apparently excellent in my case. i never have had much luck in this city...
but no. he is a musician (warning #1) who is in several different ventures in town. i met him when he got a massage-in fact, three in under two weeks. and he asked me to come check out one of his shows. so i did. and he was so nice, asked me for a drink afterward, etc. then, poof...nothing. for three weeks. so about the time i had let it go (and met someone else-more on that later) he calls and asks me to a different show of his. i wasnt busy, so sure-i went. and he was so nice, bought me a drink, dedicated a song to me as his massage therapist (which gave me quite a few stares and the obligitory comment about happy endings-people, i have heard it before-not original and not so funny.) then, a girl from his work shows up and i have seen her around so i start talking to her. well, when his set finishes he comes over and starts talking, drinking, and flirting with both of us. im still not bothered because im thinking-"she's a co-worker, he's got chemistry with me..." the night goes on and on...maybe i should have left earlier...in any case-i start to realize this girl is a showpony. she is so much like so many people i was on tour with.
"look at me, look at me-see me prance, wanna hear a song?" generally, these are very fun people and i love em, i swear. but through the fog of alcohol i started to realize this pony was planning on getting the blue ribbon that night. i am not a competitor. i will not talk over someone else to be heard. and i will not sing and dance to get laid-no matter how attractive the guy is. the sad thing is in my hopeful naivete i thought surely this attractive, talented man isnt going to fall for this-any minute she's going home-and maybe i'll go home with him. i am not an idiot-but i swear i thought he was just indulging his co-worker and waiting to be alone with me. till i came back from the bathroom. that fucked up feeling of when your heart literally hits the floor when you see the guy you thought you liked sucking face with the showpony and you realize he's not indulging her, he's indulging you and they are probably sweating bullets just waiting for you to leave so they can get the hell out of there and go have all kinds of animalistic sex. i think i actually felt my heartbeat in my ears. needless to say, i made feeble excuses and left-but not before he invited me to another show of his a few days later. dont ask me why i said yes-shock perhaps-yes, yes-anything to get out of here this instant. dont ask me why i went-but i did. maybe out of morbid curiousity-my inate desire to punish and ridicule myself. he talked to me between sets for one minute and said, "if you care about me-PLEASE have a beer waiting for me when i finish." sure, i got him a beer. which he came and got and walked away with for twenty minutes after the show. when he finally came back i told him i had to go. can you guess what happened....?
he invited me to yet ANOTHER show! thats when i realized-he's a fucking showpony too!!! meanwhile, ive really been getting more into another guy im seeing-so im thinking-"screw this jackass, really!!!"
i fully planned on probably never seeing him again (unless he comes in for massage of course which is out of my hands.)
but then last night...
jessie and i decided we will stop going to the bars during the week and go to the gym instead. last night was our first night going. i got there early and felt incredibly intimidated for whatever reason so i walked out front to wait for her. can anyone guess who i ran into? in my oversized, unfashionable workout clothes, greasy ponytail hair and no makeup? does anyone feel my pain?
yep-it was him. he pranced right up to me. there are 2.5 million people in las vegas. the odds of runnning into someone you dont want to see are extremely slim. the odds of running into them when you are having an insecurity-driven mini-panic attack and looking truly at your most hellish are apparently excellent in my case. i never have had much luck in this city...
posted by lightaqua at 10:35 PM
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